by Kimberly | Apr 21, 2013 | Books
I really wish I had written this book. Lucado talks about some of my favorite created things: the ocean and the mountains. On a personal note: that’s why I always thought NC or VA are the perfect states because you have both within a few hours of each other. The wonder of East Coast living…but I digress.
Lucado does an excellent and theologically-accurate job of describing God’s love to kids in a way that they can tangibly see and touch and feel. One of the canvases he discusses is the ocean. Another one is mountains. And a third is the stars. All three can demonstrate to a child some ways that could help them know God’s love better. Even as an adult who has been a believer most of my life, I think the ocean is the best way to communicate God’s love and other characteristics to others. I think much of Psalm 19 and Romans 1 when I look at the oceans.
While this book doesn’t go into every aspect of God’s love or many more of His characteristics, it gives a good base to start from and it is good for little children (toddlers).
The writing goes well with the illustrations that are beautifully done in a fashion that will appeal to children. That’s the only downside to kindle books – you don’t get the beautiful illustrations in a book you can hold.
Thankful for this book. Elijah loved it and it will be read a lot by my little boy (and Little2 who is on the way).
by Kimberly | Apr 18, 2013 | Uncategorized
“Hear my voice according to your steadfast love.” – Psalm 119.149a
This verse brought me much hope and rejoicing earlier this week. But, how do we do this in our counseling of one another.
King David, the Psalmist, had written just verses before about a fervency in prayer – day and night. In this verse he gives a clue as to why he liked to pray: he knows that God will answer him and hear his voice according to the LOVE and covenantal character of God. He wouldn’t listen and judge according to our sins.
This should be how we counsel with others. I’ve never had counseling training, so you may not think I know what I’m talking about, but I’ve been counseling girls (youth, college) and now women in mentoring relationships for about 20 years now. And I’ve needed counseling before. When I was in seminary, I can remember a conversation with a girl I’ve discipled through the years (now one of my dearest friends) where both of us had taken a spiritual gifts inventory and both completely failed on the mercy part. But, years later, after living much more of life, we had grown in that area because of the mercy God had shown on us.
So, here are some tips for counseling, or listening, to others:
1. Listen. That doesn’t mean formulating thoughts while they are talking. This is hard for me, even in marriage, but one I constantly need to work on.
2. Offer grace and hope. If we are to be little Christs, and we are often committed to be like God in his nature, than shouldn’t we start there? That is one of the reasons I love reading Elyse Fitzpatrick’s books on counseling. The person may be coming to you admitting their sins, or may need their sins pointed out – in a loving way. Learn to realize the difference or pray that God would show you wisdom in each conversation.
3. Deal with the sin at hand. Make sure that confession and repentance and pleasing Christ is the focus and goal of the session. There is a difference between just saying you are sorry or admitting your wrong and actually confessing it and wanting to repent of it. Make that the aim.
4. Center the counseling on our hope. Every person’s hope is Christ and Christ alone. If we don’t counsel well, it will hinder some from wanting to know more about Christ or ever finding hope in the Gospel. They will think they will only find judgment in the Bible and at the cross. Yes, God is a God of justice but His wrath for believers was covered by Jesus.
If I have had a chance to counsel with you and have not offered you mercy, please forgive me, I am a work in progress too!
Charles Bridges, a pastor of old, “And not less fully is my conviction of his judgment, in dealing wisely and tenderly with me, according to his infallible perception of my need.”
by Kimberly | Apr 15, 2013 | Uncategorized
In a culture filled with twitter, Instagram, facebook, blogs, and other forms of social media, we are much more a visual culture then we were even 15 years ago. People can take and immediately post pictures of everything: the food they eat, their babies playing or sleeping, and a group of friends at a push of a button on a phone.
In this world of visual demand, what does our body language say about our modesty and our hearts. Modesty is more than what we wear, it is a posture of the heart.
Romans 6:13; Do not present your members (your body) to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness.
A few weeks ago a friend of mine asked the question about why all the girls now pose in pictures with their hands on their hips. I had grown tiresome of these similar poses, but couldn’t quite put my finger on it. There were several answers and more questions in her FB feed. Earlier this week as my husband and I were flipping through channels late at night, the answer became immediately clear. We stopped on the last 10 minutes of America’s Next Top Model, the wanna-be model reality show hosted by Tyra Banks. I used to watch this show every week, but just don’t anymore. When the final contestants were chosen, they all pose in the same way: hands on the hips, and tilted somewhat sideways (usually not straight on because it’s not a flattering pose for most women), and chests out but tilted back. This is a very provocative pose no matter what shape you are (or how much you weigh, or how many clothes you have on). It highlights the God-given curves of females. God did make our bodies the way they are: with chests and hips. But, how we use them need to be for God’s glory.
Usually when we talk about modesty, we are referring to the length of our skirts, or the shirts we wear. This post is more about our posture. I’m not questioning any of the motives of the girls I know who are taking pictures like this, but just want to highlight some of what the outward appearance appears to say.
1. Men are visual creatures. They are drawn to the sexual – many of them are at least. When we wear modest clothes, but stand in such a way that draws attention to our hips and our chest, or our butt (stiletto heels do just that, but also our stances), it doesn’t serve our brothers in Christ at all.
2. Postures can say much about our hearts. I can stand in such a way that says I’m not approachable, I don’t want to be here (the folding of arms, scowl on my face, etc). What does what I’m doing or how I’m sitting or standing say to those around me?
This past week I was in a breakout session at a Christian conference, mostly men there. There was a lady a few rows ahead of me with an almost sleeveless shirt on, arms folded behind her head, chest out, leaned back, playing with her hair. She may have just been hot or bored, but it was distracting to me (her stance) and I’m sure it was also distracting in a more dangerous way to the men sitting around and behind her. Was she aware of this? I don’t know. Just saying what her stance communicates.
If we want to stand like the Top Model models, then we communicate: look at me, here’s my body, look at these clothes. If we want to stand in a flattering but different way, then maybe we could communicate what we want to communicate: gentleness and meekness, quietness, adorning of a beautiful spirit not clothes and curves (1 Peter 3)
A great resource that compares these two (Woman of the Word vs Woman of the world) is Mary Kassian’s Girls Gone Wise in a World Gone Wild.
A great sermon to listen to on the Soul of Modesty is by CJ Mahaney – the best sermon I’ve ever heard on the subject.
by Kimberly | Apr 12, 2013 | ethics, World Events
Yesterday, my husband, son, and I had the pleasure of seeing our next child on a television screen (an ultrasound machine). Waving arms, moving head, kicking feet, beating heart. These things told us this little baby was alive and well. But, we also know that this little baby is a gift of God and life is precious. There is no way that we would ever intentionally hurt this baby.
The reports of Gosnell, the abortion doctor in Pennsylvania, doesn’t seem to have the same regard for the human life. I’ll spare you on the details, but they are gruesome and horrendous. If you haven’t read any of the reports, trust me on that one. I’ve read half an article and my husband stopped me this morning, “why are you reading this” – tears flowed as I started talking about it, wondering how anyone could do this to helpless babies or women.
But, I’m not here to point fingers at Gosnell. He has done wrong. He will either trust the Gospel on this earth or face the judgment and wrath of God in the next life. That is for certain. The wrath of God goes out to those who aren’t under the salvation of Jesus Christ.
However, we are in the same boat. So many times we can cry over the sin of Gosnell or point fingers or call him a sinner, but how often do we look at ourselves and say the same thing. The sin that we have committed and will commit is also under the need of the blood of Christ. Just this week let me tell you the sins that I’ve committed: anger, pride, contempt, argumentativeness, the “silent treatment”, impatience, idolatry, gluttony, and probably many more. Why aren’t I weeping over my sing – more often then not I justify it? Do I really think that those sins are also in need of repentance and the gospel?
So before we go pointing fingers at the hideous, inhumane actions of Gosnell, let us also remember the truth of Romans when Paul says:
“All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” (Romans 3:23)
And let us also remember our Hope:
“And are justified by His grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 3:24)
by Kimberly | Apr 4, 2013 | marriage, Uncategorized
How would you answer that question? Obviously, the conservative Kraft company (and hundreds of other companies that have products to sell: from coffee, to burgers, to car washes, deodorant, etc) think it does.
A new ad about the “Zesty” undressing dude making a salad gets “naked” to viewers to tell them to buy salad dressing. Really? This is supposed to make me want to run out and buy salad dressing?
Last night in a Colossians study at church, one of our elder’s wives taught on the sensuality of sin that we crave, and so many targets right now is in a thing called “mommy porn”. I’ve written on 50 Shades of Gray, which is pretty much porn for women and other things on this blog before, but here we go again. I wouldn’t have even known about the ad for Kraft lest I had been on facebook and several of my Christian friends had liked the ad. Seriously?
Mommy porn, like this Kraft commercial, is targeted toward women who are at home with the television on or are on social media during the day. ABC News even ran a segment on it this morning. They think that if marketers can hit that spot in a woman’s brain (or hormones) that “turn them on” and help them to feel sexy, then they can sell their product. They must think that it works (and for most women it probably does).
Does it seem to work for Christian women? Do we allow ourselves to be blinded by targets of Satan (yes, that is what this is) by buying their products. There are many products I’ve quit buying because of the premise that sex sells. I’m disgusted by these commercials. I went to ABC news to see the segment and turned this Zesty commercial off when he got to the “Beautiful pepper” part. Who writes these things?
Anyway…
1. Fill our minds. You can’t separate yourself or your family completely from culture. If you go anywhere these days you are bombarded with sex. But, what do we saturate our minds with? Is it the Word of God, wholesome books, images, good family value things? Or is it sex and porn by either what we read or watch?
2. Protect the marriage bed. I’ve been thinking a lot of this recently. Some women, even Christian women I know, tend to think that porn will help spice up a dull marriage. That is a lie from Satan too. If you have to use other means of either viewing or reading to spice up your marriage, that is nor protecting the marriage bed. That is going outside the boundaries that God set up for a marriage designed His way.
3. Honor Christ. In Colossians, Paul tells us to walk worthy of the calling that is on our lives. If we profess Christ, then we are to walk worthy of Him. Do we?
Or do we give in to a culture that uses sex, and uses it well evidently, to sell you salad dressings and cheese?
by Kimberly | Apr 3, 2013 | Uncategorized
My husband and I sit down for dinner most nights and when we think about it (3-4 times a week) we read a Scripture verse together and then pray. Last night we flipped to a new verse and he had me read it.
Funny part: I quickly read the address and thought it said John 1.8. As I started reading I said to myself, boy, this sounds like it should be in the Old Testament!” Go figure, it said Josh 1:8 instead.
“This book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good succcess.” – Josh 1:8
In business, ministry, personal life, Christian walk, there is usually something written on how to succeed. Just go look at any local bookstore and you will find more than you could possibly read on the subject.
So, here was the nation of Israel coming out of years of wandering, crossing into the land the God provided them, the death of their faithful leader was in their recent memory and a young guy comes to lead them. Joshua was brave and faithful when others weren’t. But, what does God tell him to do in order to be successful at all that may come his way (and the Israelites) as he led them? DO NOT let the Word depart. That means just what it means in Deut 6:4-9: think, read, say, do the Word ALL THE TIME.
Joshua needed to be successful. God gave him the way to do it. God had given His people His law and He demanded they keep it (and side note: since they couldn’t keep it, He had to make provision to by sending His Perfect Son who could keep the Law to be our perfect atoning sacrifice).
Anyway…
Success doesn’t come with making more money. This isn’t the health, wealth, prosperity verse of the Old Testament. If you take it with the rest of Scripture, you will find that even the faithful face many trials and even death (we all face death – but Jesus made death die).
Success doesn’t come with having a broader and bigger ministry. God may give you success by being in your home with your children, writing for a few, or speaking to none, or maybe you will have the opportunity to speak to nations or write a best-seller.
Success doesn’t mean life is perfect. As many successful people will say or at least the line of a Dan Seals country song “for everything you win there’s something lost”. Success hurts some people. Folks don’t know how to handle the success they are experiencing and some things (family, other relationships) completely fall apart. I saw a preview for a new “reality” show where 3 successful, handsome, most of the time shirtless men are looking for love. They are successful but still don’t have the love of their lives and think that a reality show is going to help find that for them.
God does promise (and He always keeps His promises) that we will have success in this life when we follow His rules. He is the Governor of this world. His success isn’t the same as our success. But, I know I would rather have His success than my own!
by Kimberly | Apr 2, 2013 | Books
My pastor is preaching through the book of Matthew right now so I thought this new commentary by Sproul would help me follow along and encourage me to keep studying. I recommend that. Not to discount your pastor’s preaching, but during the week, read more than just what he preached! You will enrich your learning on Sunday mornings!
Anyway, Sproul is working on a commentary set. I thoroughly enjoyed the Acts commentary so I was looking forward to receiving the Matthew one (especially in light of the first paragraph). Its huge – but the gospel of Matthew is tied for the book with the most chapters in the New Testament, so what did I expect.
If you know anything about Sproul, he knows the Word, knows how to preach, and has a dry humor. This is exactly what I find in the commentary. I found it to be pastoral, funny in a dry/sarcastic sort of way, but not too “brainy” where I couldn’t follow. He of course covers everything in the Gospel: the birth, the “blessings”, the Passion narrative, and everything in between.
I would recommend this commentary to those like me: maybe those who just want to read more but don’t care about the nitty gritty of text criticism, original languages, etc. He does this well enough, but not to get his readers bogged down in the details.
And in light of the recent holiday, “There is no way to overestimate the importance and significance of this event for us.” Love how he says this about the resurrection.
by Kimberly | Apr 2, 2013 | Uncategorized
People watching, I’ve loved to do it for a while. What I’m seeking to do is not pass judgment (which is a constant Spirit work in my heart), but make observances. I’ve been doing family ministry (or involved in it) for about 6 years now, so it always peaks my interest to see what I see.
I am sitting here today at my local sanctified chicken establishment. Watching families as they eat lunch, use their technological devices, and play on the indoor playground. Here are just a few glimpses into families in Little Rock. I guarantee you can find families like this in your neck of the woods, and probably in your church as well. More questions for that at the end.
1. A Mom and teenage son and daughter arrive in a purple Escalade. Mom didn’t say a word to either since they got out of the car. Son has earbuds in his ear and hasn’t said a word since sitting down. Daughter is struggling with her weight (like the rest of family) and is wearing VS Pink sweatpants. Mom finally spoke – when her cell phone rang. Other than that they are all not talking to each other and are all on their devices, whether texting or listening to music.
2. A business Dad on his lunch break (has on bank nametag and in a business suit, so I’m making an assumption here), has a quick lunch break with his son. They exchange a few words, then they depart after being here less than 15 minutes.
3. A runner-Mom (attire fits the description) allows two toddlers to play in the playground while settling into a conversation on her phone while they play.
4. A group of young moms sit together and chat while their children play on the indoor playground. They seem like they are having fun and the kids are playing nicely together.
Here are just four snippets into American life as we know it. Now, how does this apply to our churches and family ministry?
1. Family Ministry isn’t perfect. We can have the best parenting classes and programs, but our programs aren’t perfect nor our teachers – neither are the people in the class. Sin has damaged every family since the beginning of time (see Genesis 1-4).
2. Are we ready to ministry to dysfunctional families? Rarely do you see intact families these days: one marriage, kids in the family. Is that really typical? Not anymore? I’m not saying we need the 2.5 kids, white picket fence, and golden retriever, but how do you minister to families that don’t have it all together?
Answer: Prayer, biblical counseling, and coming alongside them – not just preaching at them. Share your life with them. If there is no Dad in the picture, Dads – be a Dad to those kids. If a widow, then be the church and practice true religion by loving and serving them.
3. How do our church members relate to those incoming families that may not look like everyone else? Do our members or staff want to only ministry to the put-together families or do our members and leaders want to get our hands dirty. I admit it is hard. The family I grew up in is far from perfect. There would be much I would want to change in my own family now as we raise our son. But, ministering to families who are completely different than you is hard. It takes faith and grace.
How does your church minister to families? How are you reaching a familial society that doesn’t communicate and are seldom sitting down together to talk, eat, share a meal, or even play games or do an outdoor activity or trip together?
by Kimberly | Mar 27, 2013 | Uncategorized
No electricity, milking cows, sewing my own clothes…that’s not what I mean.
However, the Amish people have a simple way of life that I think would benefit everyone to look at more closely.
Leadership strategies and professors and books would say the same thing: be intentional and prioritize your life. To be successful at anything you can’t try your hand at everything. So, how am I as a wife and mother (as my day job) seeking to live this out on a daily basis?
I have five goals. 5. Count them on one hand. Everything I do in this life I try to stick to each day (note: some days are better than others).
1. Love Jesus. Ok, this is a copout right? Wrong. If I don’t get this one right, then I don’t get any of the others right. As Matthew’s gospel says, “Seek first…JESUS”. What this looks like in my life: praying without ceasing (1 Thess 5:17), hearing my hubs read the Word or read books to me (love this time either right when we wake or right before we go to bed – this week its Passion by Mike McKinley in time for Easter), studying and journaling through my devotions (right now it is Psalm 119).
2. Love my family. My husband and son, outside of Jesus, are the two most important men in my life. I live with them, love them, serve them, rejoice with them, weep with them. I would NOT want to live life without them. So, during my day, I ask myself: what would most benefit them? Then, I try to do it. That may be doing something I dislike: ironing pants or changing diapers – or something I like: making a yummy dessert or snuggling with my boy.
3. Invest in my home. I am at Rainwood (our home) most days out of the week. I actually really love it. That is not to say that I don’t ever like to go out and have somewhere fun to go and yes, I do get stir crazy when its really cold and I don’t want to take Little Buddy out in the cold to go for a walk. But, I love seeing what our home is capable of: painting, designing, cooking, grocery shopping, menu planning, etc. I’m not a wonderful homemaker like some people I know are, but it is growing on me. I doubt I will be like some homemakers I know who sew everything, cook everything from scratch, and are up at 430 in the morning. That’s not me. If that is you, go for it. Live intentionally!
4. Invest in my creative outlet. I have two main creative outlets: this blog and other writing projects and also Grateful Praise Photography (see link at top of page). I have to have a creative outlet somewhere and these two are it. I want to put time and energy into writing and taking photos/making cards/running this business so it is successful.
5. Have meaningful friendships. I want to live a life of authentic community with people. I love opening up our home and having people in to eat and hang out with us, be a part of our family. This is something the Sweet Mister loves as well. It is our shared common vision for Rainwood and our marriage. I also want to have real relationships with people. You can’t have real relationships with people if you aren’t wiling to go beyond the surface in your conversations. You have to be willing to admit your failures. Especially as an Elder’s wife in a church: most women in their church don’t know their elder’s (or pastor’s) wives. This needs to change. And I can help implement that change.
What are your life’s goals and how do you structure your schedule to fulfill your goals?
by Kimberly | Mar 26, 2013 | Bible, Books
I have a love-hate relationship with certain books.
The one relationship I have now is with Dave Harvey’s Rescuing Ambition. It is a very heart-check book but one that is difficult to handle when he writes things that the Spirit is convicting you of and wanting to eradicate in your life.
“We love glory. We were created to look for is and to love it when we find it. We’re pursuers – we go after things we value. What is it for you?” (Pg 21, 19)
If I say I’m a believer, and live my life for the glory of God…then why do I write? Do I honestly want to write this blog, write books, teach Bible studies for my glory or for the glory of God?
That is what I’ve been wrestling with this month. I want readership. I want to write a book and not have it just sit on a shelf and be a coaster on someone’s coffee table. I want it to change someone’s life. Why? So that God can get more glory than me – that His name can be made much of – or if I was honest would I say that I want people to know my name and my blog and think what I do is great and meaningful?
I do love to write. This has been a hard month, but one of more time to just be (or play Candy Crush) or to play with our son. My Sweet Mister doesn’t want me to give up writing. He encourages my writing. That is encouraging to me. I want to do what I do with a right heart toward the God who gave me the gift of writing and speaking in the first place. Not for notoriety or fame or publication or for thousands of hits. I need to keep this on the forefront of my mind daily as I start back to writing again.
So, for the three of you that read this blog, thank you. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life. Be glory-seekers, too!
