by Kimberly | Sep 16, 2013 | marriage, Prayers for the Journey, Uncategorized
One of the most important daily things that a wife can do for her husband…is pray for him. I learned this concept almost 17 years before I actually got married, but believe me – it is so true!
I can tell the days I pray for my husband, and I can tell the days that I don’t. Prayer is our conversation with a God who daily is involved and the leader of our lives. Jesus is interceding for us, and the Spirit helps us when we don’t know what to pray.
That is why I’ve created Prayers for the Journey. These free downloadable journals are yours for the printing. It is a journey through a specific book of the Bible, with a Scripture, a prayer, a journaling space, and additional verses or helps. I figured if I didn’t know really how to pray the Word for my husband, some others may not know either. These journals are designed for you to pray the Word specifically for areas you know your husband needs them. You are his greatest prayer warrior. You know him best. So, who best to pray for him daily!
My husband and I wanted these booklets to be a resource for you. So, if you use it and like it – make it available to other women (in your church, women’s ministry, neighborhood, small group, family, etc).
The walk of marriage you are on with your husband is indeed a journey – live it to the fullest!
Here are what some friends who have already read it have said:
From Phyllis Robshaw (married 35 years)
I can’t say it enough. Soak in the Living Word and claim these promises that are so beautifully expressed here. Ooo yes, personalize them for your loved ones. You are praying in HIS will and the answer is always “yes!” His timing, His way, but “yes!” The Holy Spirit taught me to do this early in my marriage and after almost 35 years, I am more passionate about it than ever!!! O how FAITHFUL our God is! Expect a harvest!!
From Renee Fisher (www.reneefisher.com, author, married about 2 years)
Kimberly understands the importance of praying for your husband. I prayed for 12 years, 10 months, and 24 days from the day I knew God promised me a mate to the day Marc proposed. Regardless of where along the journey you are praying for your husband–Kimberly recognizes prayer and reading the Word is important. Definitely check out Prayers for the Journey. You will be blessed you did!
From Amelia McNeilly (single, www.mywalkofgrace.com, agent)
Prayers for the Journey by Kimberly Campbell is a must read. It is 30 day devotional based on praying for your husband using passages from Ephesians. Each day highlights a different passage and a prayer. This is an ideal prayer resource not only for wives but single women as well. As a single person, this book is a great encouragement, because these are prayers that can can currently be prayed for my future husband. I’m already looking forward to Kimberly’s next book!
From Jennifer Sharpe (married for 15 years, editor of Treasuring Christ Curriculum)
Our husbands need our prayers. Kim’s fresh approach to praying for your husband will ignite your passion for being his most faithful prayer intercessor. I urge you to take this journey through the book of Ephesians and discover a deeper love for your husband.
I had serious help with this.
First, my husband read it and was blessed by it – but also gave some constructive criticism.
Second, my mentor for almost 20 years, Phyllis, is the one who taught me by example how to do this in the first place.
Amy Torcasso of Treasuring Christ fame and a blessing of a friend did all the design work.
Sarah Bowen, to be married this weekend, was a great editor. I look forward to her living out these as she gets married to her husband in just 5 days!
by Kimberly | Sep 4, 2013 | Books, marriage
Whoever said being married to a pastor was easy – hasn’t been married to a pastor. Let me explain and in that explanation, tell you why I chose (and liked) Jared’s book The Pastor’s Justification – a book for pastors (not pastor’s wives).
When I went to seminary, I went for the purpose of getting further training so I could do what I wanted to do: disciple. If marriage came with that, great. But, at 23, that was not my main goal. I was there to learn how to do ministry and engage in ministry. I did meet girls there who said they were there because they knew they were called to be a pastor’s wife and seminary was the place to find single men entering the ministry.
Now, 14 years almost after entering seminary, having been married to a pastor for almost 2 years, I can tell you that there really is nothing glamorous about being a pastor’s wife. And that is why I chose to read Wilson’s book. And it’s a good one.
Don’t get me wrong: I love my husband, I love being married to him, I love serving him, and I love being his wife. I love ministry, I love doing ministry – but it is hard. It is hard to see your husband get beat up at work (not currently or literally, no black eyes yet). There have been times when ministry is hard and there are more times when it is a joy. It is hard to see him discouraged at times and wonder why the church would do that to him (because the church is full of sinners), and sometimes you just want him to be able to worship in church with you (but have to wait until vacation to be able to do that). As a friend who is also a pastor’s wife said, “Sundays make me feel like a single mom”.
Wilson, a pastor in Vermont, writes a very personal, very relatable, and insightful book for pastors. But, I also think it can be useful for pastor’s wives as well. Wives: if you want to know some of the heartache, pull, weight that is in your husband’s heart at times, read this book. Know how to encourage your husband in the gospel of Christ when he is discouraged. When your pastor husband feels like a failure and you don’t know what to do, this book might be insightful for you. Wilson takes many of the struggles that ALL pastors face and puts them up against our sinful spirit, and the grace and cross of Jesus. Our husbands aren’t successful because the numbers of the church increase or more people get baptized or the giving is on the up: they are successful because they are in Jesus.
Here are some ways you can read this book:
1. If you have multiple pastor’s wives in your church: read this book together. I think it would be great to have a monthly gathering of pastor’s wives, sip coffee or tea, eat a cookie or fruit, and talk about this book – be real, be vulnerable, and share what God is doing in your marriage.
2. Read this book with your husband. It will strengthen your marriage more than you think. You need to be in constant dialogue with your pastor husband. He needs to know where you are struggling and you need to know where he is struggling. Who else has that much insight into her husband’s heart?
by Kimberly | Jul 2, 2013 | Books, marriage, Uncategorized
Is the title of the blog news to anyone? Anyone who is married, in a relationship, friends with someone, or even just someone who loves yourself – you know the truth to the title – Loving is Hard.
Loving may not be hard when you look at the way the world defines or acts out love. If you have ever watched an episode of the Bachelor or Bachelorette or any other “matchmaking” reality show – you might think that love is all fun, easy, and highly entertaining. But, one thing you would not find much of on these shows is the Biblical definition of love.
Some ladies here in AR this summer are studying a newer Crossway release that I had already read and reviewed but am going back through with some friends. It is a highly convicting read – Phil Ryken’s Loving the Way Jesus Loves – but so good. The point of Ryken’s book is not to put love in a certain category, but make Jesus love applicable to every area of your life. Ryken takes the basic outline and characteristics of 1 Corinthians 13 and puts it in context of the gospels – showing how Jesus fulfilled every one of these characteristics of love.
One of the hardest displays of love is “love is not irritable”. At least it is one of the hardest for me to live every day. One aspect of love that I am working on in our marriage is not giving the silent treatment when I am hurt. I tend to be easily offended (that is the one thing I am often seeking forgiveness for) and my way of dealing with it (sinful way) is the silent treatement. That does nothing for a marriage at all. My rationale for it is I don’t want to say anything in the moment that would hurt worse – but while there is wisdom in it – during my silent time I’m usually becoming more angry rather than praying and seeking God’s wisdom on what to do about the occuring situation.
Jesus has never given me the silent treatment. He listens, talks (through his Word and the Holy Spirit), ever pleads my case to the Father. I need to be more like Jesus – keeping in mind that it isn’t my righteousness at all that makes me look or act or love better – but only having more of the love of Jesus in me – which is all Ryken’s premise in the first place.
Do you find it hard to love? Easy to love? Pick up this book for encouragement and edification in how to love.
by Kimberly | Jun 11, 2013 | marriage
“Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” – Simone Weil
A friend tweeted this quote last week and I thought immediately of how it should (but often doesn’t) apply to my marriage. In a day filled with multi-tasking and technology and social media – this form of generosity tends to go right out the window.
Here are prime examples from our marriage:
1. Some date nights – I want to bring my phone along to take a picture of the food, make sure the sitter doesn’t have any questions, post what I’m doing, etc. Those might be noble reasons – but what often ends up occurring is I’ll check facebook, answer texts from all sorts of people, and not pay attention to my husband.
2. When my husband is home, often I am on the computer – meaning the iPad. Whether I am playing silly pointless games or writing blogs, I don’t spend enough time just with him.
Do either of these examples sound familiar to you? How can we change it and pay more attention to our marriages?
Solution #1: Leave cell phone in the car or at home. I now always make sure that the sitter has my husband’s cell as well. He doesn’t have a data plan on his phone so he only gets calls and texts. Much better in terms of “emergencies” without distractions. If we are going to a really cool place, then have your husband keep you accountable to taking picture – but posting them later, if that is something you really enjoy doing (like me).
Solution #2: Put down the iPad. Please step away from technology. I have plenty of nap times (for my infant) during the day to get all the blog-writing done that I need to. This week I have a self-imposed book deadline so it is a rarity – and my husband likes what I’m doing.
Solution #3: Set goals for your marriage. We recently talked about this and want to start doing it. So, once a year, probably ear the time we first met (beginning of February) we will seek to go away and have a marriage retreat to talk about the common goals that we have in our marriage for the coming year. The reason we chose this time instead of nearer to our anniversary is our family/life calendars. The fall is a busy time for us: anniversary, 2 birthdays, and my husband is super busy at work preparing for Christmas services. It would be too stressful on us to try to force a time in the fall – so we chose another time. It doesn’t matter what time – but just make sure it is away, without the kids, and overnight, oh – and done. This is going to valuable for us!
Solution #4: Read together. Currently we are reading When Sinners Say I Do with another couple in our church (who have been married much longer than us) and we are reading The Meaning of Marriage before bed on most nights. If we are taking a toad trip – we bring a book along to read in the car (usually me since E does most of the driving).
Solution #5: Go on dates. We started (before kids) with a weekly date night, now we get one about every 3 weeks. That is still better than most. And that is a time we go out and grab dinner or do something fun while someone watches our little one. We are blessed with amazing babysitters who never tire of our sweet boy. Make it a habit to date your spouse!
Solution #6: Don’t overcrowd your schedule. There will be seasons of busyness in your family’s schedule. But, don’t make it a habit. I know around Christmas time, even if we don’t travel, will be extremely busy because my husband is on staff at a church. But, for most weeks, we try to have most evenings at home. We have learned in a short amount of time being married that we need this more than almost anything else. If we go days without being at home with each other in the evenings, we get into arguments or just don’t know what is going on in each other’s lives.
If you want your marriage to not only survive, but also thrive in this culture of skyrocketing divorce rates and meaningless marriages – seek to apply one or more of these solutions.
by Kimberly | May 29, 2013 | marriage, mothering
We have a Tudor style home – one with large peaks on its corner As we were trying to see about getting the siding replaced this past weekend, I realized how I would never want my husband up on that roof. How dangerous would that be.
That brings new light to this Proverb: “Better to live on the corner of a roof, then to share a house with a nagging wife.”
How would you say you are in the nagging area? Nagging can be so much more than just pestering your husband to take out the trash or pick up his socks.
I’ve learned something about this this past weekend as well. My husband can sense when I am upset ( I don’t have a very good poker face), and more times than not he knows why I am down or struggling. We’ve only been married for less than two years, but he knows me well (and sometimes, that’s very scary).
But, I could have either chosen to say something about what it was that was bothering me, and therefore make him feel even worse about said subject, which we’ve had many conversations about – or I could choose to praise him and give thanks to him and shower him with blessings for everything he does for me and how godly of a husband and worship pastor and father he is.
Which do you think is better?
Nagging or praising?
I remember watching the movie classic, If a Man Answers, one in which the MIL wants her daughter to begin treating her husband like a dog to see if his behavior changes any. Most dog owners will tell you that dogs can be trained with rewards, love, scratching behind the ears, etc.
I’m not saying that is the way to go – more than likely – when you start praising your husband, you will find the things you are unhappy about will change or disappear altogether.
The Bible also tells us to speak words or encouragement to those around us, respect our husbands (nagging doesn’t fall in the respect category), and speak well of them to others. If we are constantly nagging or thinking poorly of our husbands, won’t that come out in our speech to others? However, if we are constantly loving our husbands well with our speech, then others will follow suit.
Don’t we want to encourage others to walk in love and good deeds?
And how important are the socks on the floor anyway?
